That’s right, I’m talking about Christmas. Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas. I love the time off work, I love eating and drinking too much and I love seeing the kids open presents and have more fun than any kid should have in one day.
But what I DON’T love is the crowds. I’ve noticed that since returning from my overseas deployments, I only have a small tolerance for crowds and for people’s self-centred, bullshit behaviour. People who just stop walking while you’re behind them, or people who stand in doorways and chat on their phone, so nobody can get past.
A few years back, I wrote to Santa and asked him to contact me. I told him that we needed to talk about his visit each year, and after a few weeks of waiting, I got an e-mail from him. Naturally, he used a dodgy e-mail address, probably in the fear that I’d reveal his official e-mail address to the world.
But we got cyber-chatting about the presents he brings and how much work I have to go through to buy the presents that I give to my kids. I told him that I have to fight the crowds for hours, whether I’m buying one little present, or ten big ones. So I made him an offer, and I think that what we’ve settled on actually benefits both of us.
Santa only brings my kids one present each now – and it’s not the BIG present. You know, the bike, or the trampoline or the iPod/Pad/Touch device. My theory is that, sure Santa has a busy job visiting everyone and dropping off presents, but HE doesn’t have to fight the Westfield crowds, does he?
His response to my offer came a little too quickly, and it kind of had me thinking that maybe he would like this offer from more parents. After all, it will cut back on the number of presents the elves need to make, and it dramatically cuts down the time the big guy needs to spend at each house.
But it’s not like I leave Santa out in the cold. No pun intended there, especially since Christmas in Australia is HOT HOT HOT. He did comment that he still wanted to live in my kids’ hearts, so the agreement is that the gift he leaves is a good one – just not the best one.
Unfortunately, one year the two of us did need quite a bit of back-and-forth co-ordinating Christmas, since my kids were asking for some pretty cool stuff. But we talked it out and came to a good agreement.
So don’t be afraid. If you hate the crowds as much as I do, then maybe it’s time to get a little more kudos from your kids. Have a chat with Santa and come to the same agreement as I have. My kids adjusted pretty quickly, and still love getting their gift from Santa. But at least now, when they get something like a bike, it’s ME that gets the credit.
